Mac STUPIDNESS #2

I can delete backwards but not forwards? Why in hell not?

Yes, I know all of this is old hat to all you switchers. But before I rant, let's talk about Dickface. Who is probably reading this and doesn't know it's him.

Conversation with Dickface circa 1990.
Dickface: What do I need a computer for?
Us: Well, you can send email instantly.
Dickface: I have a telephone what do I need email for?
Us: Well, you can write with it.
Dickface: I have a word processor now. It's called a pencil and paper.
Us: You could use a database for your business.
Dickface: (revealing an entire wall of index cards) I've got the whole thing on a system. It works without electricity...

Dickface, apparently, now has a Mac. I say this because when I was looking up workarounds I saw him all over the Net saying things like, "I don't know why you need to delete forward when the delete key works fine..." Listen, Dickface, I don't NEED the button. And you don't NEED a Mac. You actually don't NEED to do anything except eat, sleep, and die. Why do I need keys that delete forward and backwards? Because I use them both, that's why. I use them a lot.

Dickface is apparently not going to be a help in making a XP->Mac transition.

So how do you delete forward? Fn+Delete. Why this combo? Because if you picked two keys further apart, they would be on different computers. That's right - they are the two keys furthest apart on the keyboard and it's physically impossible to do with one hand.

I did find out, however, that CTL+D also works. That's a little better. I'd be much obliged if anyone can tell me the simple way to make COMMAND+DELETE to delete forward or give me a compelling reason why I don't want that.

Mac STUPIDNESS #1

There's no right click button?

I guess I knew that going in, and I quickly learned the workarounds (CTL+click or two fingers on the pad + click) but why hasn't the Mac incorporated contextual menus? It certainly can't cost much to add another clicker. I started to think how stubborn Steve Jobs must be, refusing to adapt any Windows improvements. Then I mentioned it to a Mac dickhead who said, "I've never had even ONE occasion to use a right click."

So there's no right click because either Apple is stubborn or Apple thinks their users are idiots. Or both. Now I know why my Macfriends don't have problems with their machines - they don't use them. They use all factory settings and only tap about 5% of its capability. It's just a cute little plastic MacSpeak and Spell.

So what in hell am I doing here?